Bone Scan Requested: Nerves on Fire or Wake Up Call?

I got a wake-up call this week. My oncologist left me a message that he is recommending a bone scan due to my liver panel being off, twice. I knew this fact would warrant another test of some sort. However, to date, the testing was at the recommendation of my primary care physician. So, to have my oncologist call to ask me to have a bone scan left my jaw on the floor and caused an avalanche of unexpected tears.

Mind you, I am TIRED! My first week back at work has been a blessing and a curse. Looming deadlines and stalled grant projects lead to a roller coaster of fire drills that I am making my way through. No worries. The pressure of grant deadlines has helped to keep my mind occupied.

Truth be told, I have been expecting to learn that I have weak bones due to chemo. The fact that these tests are off could be an indicator of any number of things. We are thinking positive.

I told my husband this morning that I think the fact that I have to have a bone scan is a good wake-up call. We both need to live a healthier lifestyle because like it or not, I am living the life of a cancer survivor. These tests will always mean a little bit more. I will probably always feel like I have dodged a bullet.

Today, I actually scheduled the bone scan for Tuesday, April 26. And as positive as I may sound, I have to admit that my nerves are on fire. There are butterflies in my stomach and I cannot sit still. Nothing that lunch with a girlfriend and another grant deadline can't cure though, hopefully. More to come......

To a Grapefruit

My expander was filled with 100 more cc's of saline yesterday. Or as Steve put it, "It went from the size of an orange to the size of a grapefruit." As I am writing this, it occurs to me that I do not know quite what to call "it". It is not quite a breast in my mind. It is more like a section of skin that is slowly expanding with every visit to the plastic surgeon.

I will say that it makes me happy to have "something" on my chest big enough that matches the size of my prosthetic, which I have resumed wearing. Wearing my prosthetic means I get to wear my pretty bras from Nordstrom's. I know my women friends understand: pretty bras just make you feel more feminine.

So, to the surgery....This week, Dr. Scott officially filed paperwork for my reconstruction. He estimates up to a six month wait, but at the same time, was fairly confident that I would be able to have surgery in March 2011. This is my goal month: far enough away from summer to where I will be fully recovered  for our family vacation yet after State Cup, when Harrison will end his soccer season. Of note, I am making special dispensation for State Cup, as it involves at least one weekend of travel. Since we have never been, I did not want Steve to be in a position to have to go it alone. (Plus, I heard the parents have just as much fun as the kids do....and I do not want to miss out!)

I chose my implant: gel. Also, known as the "gummy bear" type. We talked about my options for surgery again. I am confident. I have one more fill on my expander to go, unless we decide to over fill. It still does not hurt or cause me any discomfort.

Finally, Dr. Scott and I spoke of my plan to run a half marathon in February. He is 110% behind the idea as he feels that people who have been through what I have been through desire a sense of physical accomplishment. That, and he agrees that my training will help prepare me for surgery, which will be my most painful, trying surgery to date.

I can hardly wait for both. Today, I am nursing the start of what could be shin splints. I used to run on the Cross Country team in high school, so I am familiar. They worry me a bit.....but I hear that a lot of stretching will help to curtail their painful affects. I will keep you posted....grapefruit and all........