Fight. To engage in battle or in single combat; attempt to defend oneself against or to subdue, defeat, or destroy an adversary.
Fight to destroy an adversary.
This is what Marsi has been doing against cancer for just under three years. Fighting to not let cancer destroy her spirit and strength. Fighting to maintain her time on this earth as a wife, mother, daughter, sister, and woman. Fighting to slay the dragon, as she would say to me often, as we talked about still growing old together. My wife Marsi, is a warrior.
I wanted to write in her blog today to update everyone on her condition. Marsi so loved sharing herself and her battle with breast cancer through this blog that I did not want anyone to be left wondering what happen to her, as she has not been able to continue to write herself.
The medicine Marsi takes to keep the pain of cancer at bay has taken away her ability to see clearly and type on a keyboard. The cancer also has continued to grow, spreading across her liver and abdomine, as well as now being more prevalent in the lungs. Over the years, Chemotherapy seemed to have some affect against this terrible cancer, but with the cancer spreading to the liver and the liver being the organ that filters these harsh chemotherapy drugs from the body, Marsi's liver and body could not keep up the fight anymore. So today, with the recommendation of Marsi's Oncologist, we are looking into Hospice care.
Comfort and time is so precious to us now. We now understand that in life, it is the small things that matter the most. Holding her hand as she lays in bed, a quick soft kiss or smile from her beautiful face. This is my gold. This is my treasure. Strength is what she tells me I must have. Strength for my children, my family, and for myself to not let her passing destroy what we created together. Strength she tells me to have when she is the strong one. But I know I will have that strength and the kids and I will survive, because of all our wonderful family and friends. Family is the rock that gets you through it and friends are what keeps you from going crazy. To all our family and friends that have been there for Marsi and I, in anyway through this terrible fight, please know that we love you and thank you for everything.
With all this said, please comment and offer support through the comments section of this blog, so I can read them to Marsi and see her smile. Being positive and keeping the will to fight is everything to me and I need my girl to fight as long as she can. She is my strength, my love, and my world. She is my beautiful bride.
With all my heart, with all my soul, with all I am, I love you Marsi. --- Steven
Love you both "to the moon and back"!!Cousin Liz
ReplyDeleteThank you for writing for all of us<Steve.
ReplyDeleteYour words have calmed my fears and moved my heart.
Love to you and Marsi and all.
Dear Steve, Thank you for writing. Hugs and love to you, Marsi, the kids, parents et al.
ReplyDeleteDear Steve, Thank you for this update about your beautiful bride. You are her rock and strength and stay strong for her. Sending you lots of positive thoughts, hugs and love.
ReplyDeleteCharleen
Steve,
ReplyDeleteHold her hand, kiss her cheek, smile at her, share a memory each day, and make her smile! I believe that a smile reflects the warmth of our hearts, and the love we have to share.
We love you both so much, and if I could do anything to stop this I would.
I don't know what else to say, my heart is so full of emotion. LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!
Stu & Heather
This is a beautiful blog to match your beautiful bride. Thank you for the update. We are all here for you, Marsi & the kids. Hugs & love to all of you. The Pearson Family
ReplyDeleteMarsi's strength, courage, perseverance and sense of peace that she has exhibited over the years as she's battled this disease have been inspiring. The legacy she is leaving will live on forever in you, Steve, and the kids and to innumerable people who have read her blog, viewed her photographs, and watched her precious video clips. My prayer is that you all have peace and comfort in the days ahead and that you feel the presence of the Lord holding your hand. Love, Cindy (Westin) Crist from VHS
ReplyDeleteThank you both for the update. All of our love and prayers are going out to your whole family. Marsi, you have grown so much since I first met you in yearbook class. The strength and courage you have is amazing. I am so glad that you and my best friend Steve found each other. You all know if you are in need of anything, we are here for you. With all of our love, Kyle, Esther, and Javier Rascon
ReplyDeleteDear Marsi and Steve - Last night I had a dream with Marsi in it - I can't remember the dream other than the fact that Marsi was happy and smiling. So I looked up the blog site today. At a loss for words - except that Cancer sucks! Marsi thou has somehow risen above all of this and is teaching us all life lessons. She is incredible and beautiful inside and out. She is an amazing lady in so many ways and we are all so lucky to have her touching our lives. Thank you for the update. Love and strength to you and your beautiful family.
ReplyDeleteSteve, I don't think we ever met during the short year that Marsi and worked together on grants. But I will never forget her kindness as she took the newbie (me) to lunch at the Mexican restaurant overlooking the little airport next to the hospital. She was an incredible source of light, so I have followed her blog ever since. In my experience, hospice is wonderful. Please let Marsi know she is still in my thoughts and prayers, and that the universe is taking care of her in ways she may never know. Hugs, Michele
ReplyDeleteYou have both been so positive, uplifting and courageous through this entire journey. You have taught us all not to take any bit of life, joy, love and delightful moments for granted. I hope you both can find comfort in knowing that you have so many people who love and support you, who admire the way you've gone to battle and for the open hearts with which you've shared this journey. Our main focus, as is yours, is to make sure our dear Marsi is comfortable, smiling and knows just how much she is loved. You are both so very loved and cherished. Warm hugs to both of you. - Shanna
ReplyDeleteBeautiful words Steve. Your beautiful wife is the strongest person I know. She has fought and will continue to fight this terrible disease with a great attitude! Sitting here with tears rolling down my face, I feel like such a baby and wish I had a quarter of the strength she has. I am trying to have an attitude like Marsi and instead of being so angry at the hand she so did not deserve, but instead be grateful of the opportunity God gave me to meet such an amazing woman and be thankful that I was able to share many fun times together with not only Marsi but with all the "White Folk"! Thinking about all the PTA meetings and the trips to SD Brewery after to deal with them, our impromptu dinners at my house, Halloween with everyone, the many nights at the Liquor Store, dinner and dyeing our hair at Julann’s, our last minute trip to Vegas (the kids had so much fun! We still laugh about how Ryan and I rushed the kids to Treasure Island to see the pirate show, got H and Johnny up front and then it being soooo inappropriate!) These are so many more memories I will hold close to my heart.
ReplyDeleteI know you can do this Steve and know you are never alone. You have many people that are there for your family. You have been taught by the best!!! I remember sitting with Marsi one time and she said she was letting you do Easter and how you went to CVS and got everything for the kids. She said you did a good job….needed a few adjustments but overall you did good!
Please keep us informed of when she would like a visitor or if you need anything for the kids, I’m only a text away. And please give that beautiful wife of yours the BIGGEST gentlest hug and kiss from me! I LOVE YOU MARSI !!!!!!
XOXO Laurie
Steve that was beautiful. It is very true it is the little things that matter the most! We all get so busy and forget. This is a reminder to all at how fragile life is and to make each day the very best you can. We live in a very crazy filled world but if we just stop and remember to do the little things it can make it much better. You both are absolutely amazing! Marsi your strength and positive attitude have been a priceless gift to all the people you have touched in life. Seeing you both last week including the kids was so nice! You both know we are always a phone call or text away from whatever you may need or not need. Maybe just a chat or to bounce off ideas. We are here for all of you at anytime day or night. Don't ever hesitate! We love you!
ReplyDeleteI have been so proud of you, Marsi and the life you have built over the years! Was so happy when Steve came along- what an excellent choice to make him your loving husband! With your amazing careers, and the aboslutley beautiful, perfect family you two have created, I have watched you blossom into an amazing, strong woman and have been filled with pride and love to call you a dear friend. Whether it be you coming up here or us down there, I always look forward to our visits because your cuteness and honesty about petty things have never changed, and it always makes me giggle! One thing I'll be honest about, is when I met you 23 years ago in that dorm room, I would've never expected you to be the person who becomes my biggest source of inspiration. I never knew you had it in you to "slay this dragon" the way you have. I'm not sure I have ever come across anyone who has done it better, or with more class, than you! Although, I expect the classiness of course. When I think of class, I think Marsi...Marsi= Class...And now Marsi also= Courage, Strength and Great Inspiration to all her many friends! I love you dearly Marsi Kay! And I get to see you in a couple days, we're trekkin' it down. YAY!!! XOXOXO to you all! Love, Carrie
ReplyDeleteSteve....and we all thought of Marsi as the writer, this was almost as beautiful as her. Please know that you all dont owe us anything...we are the lucky ones to count you as friends. Marsi and her incredible example of strength, fight and goodness have changed us all forever. I am a better person for knowing her. We will all be by you and your kids side....tell her we will never go away and will always make sure you are always ok. We stand firm in our love for all of you and pray God'S hands over her.....and mostly for peace and calming hearts for Harrison and Maddie. Love, Rebecca D
ReplyDeleteBeautiful words, Steve, and I will remember them. You and Marsi and the kids are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so glad to be able to see you guys this weekend and hug my beautiful friend. We are here for you both, always and forever. Love, Shelley
ReplyDeleteAmazing words from a loving and devoted husband and father. Marsi has touched so many of us with her frank discussion of her FIGHT. I am thankful to know her! Praying for her comfort, your strength, and peace for all of you.
ReplyDeleteThank you for reaching out through the blog, Steve. All of my love to you, Marsi and the kids!! ~ Lisa
ReplyDeleteThank you, Steve, for sharing this. I have long admired Marsi and you for sharing this "battle" publicly and am in awe (but not surprised) of how much support and love you have received from your friends and family. As hard as this has been for you and your family, you have also realized a rare never-ending love that not everyone has a chance to experience. May you spend your days close--enjoying every precious moment, every precious breath together. And may you both exchange many sweet loving smiles. I pray for your comfort and strength, Marsi, and for your comfort and strength, Steve. --Cyndie
ReplyDeleteSteve and Marsi,
ReplyDeleteThis is beautifully written and heartbreaking to try and understand. Marsi is such an amazing person with a beautiful spirit that matches her smile. I, and my family, will continue to pray for peace, understanding, strength and grace for your entire family. Marsi has touched so many lives with her caring soul. Her willingness to share her journey has been a true inspiration. Learning from Marsi has helped me to help other friends who have faced similar diagnoses and are still fighting as well. When Marsi and I worked together at Rady Children’s, I always could count on a friendly smile and silly anectode from Marsi when I was having a rough day. I remember when Harrison was born and the sheer joy that Marsi radiated when she first became a mom to that precious boy. Please give her hand a squeeze from me and remind her again that she is loved by so many of us.
Steve, thank you so much for sharing with us. Marsi is such a fighter. She is in our thoughts and prayers everyday. Marsi is such an inspiration to all. She has and continues to share her journey with everyone with such beautiful words from a beautiful person.
ReplyDeleteMarsi, I just want you to know how much you have touched us. We pray for you and give you strength and love to carry you through your journey. Thank you for everything you have done for so many people! Keep strong! We love you!
Love The Dean Family
Steve, your words above are beautiful. Marsi and your family have fought like warriors. The love and support that you have for one another is extraordinary - it will remain forever. I pray that each of you have peace to get you through this time. Michael and I are here if you need anything at all. Big hugs to each of you. Love you, Marsi. You are my Ms. Mars (Marce). Chris Meyer Morgan xoxoxoxoxoxox
ReplyDeleteMarsi & Steve - I remember you both and your beautiful family in my prayers each day. The strength and compassion you have all exhibited while fighting this disease has inspired eveyone who knows you. Kristin Watkins
ReplyDeleteSteve, thank you for your beautiful expression of love and admiration for Marsi. I met Marsi over 12 years ago at Rady Children's -- both of us handling grants in different departments, but coordinating our efforts the best we could. I still remember her as a new mom, bringing in pictures of Harrison and then Maddie. Marsi radiated sweetness and calm, and although there were some pretty crazy times in her work life, she always seemed to find a reason to smile. Please let her know that I think of her often, as do many others at Children's, and am wishing her peace. Lisa Lomas
ReplyDeleteMarsi and Steve, I think of you often and wish we lived closer. We pray for your comfort and thank you for living such an inspired life. Everyone who knows you has been touched by your strength and we now pray for your peace. We love you all...Marsi, Steve, Harrison and Maddie.
ReplyDeleteDawn and Joe Jastrzebski
Bartlett, Il
Steve, we are thinking about your family, alot , and sending all of our postive, thoughts, and prayers your way. The words that you have written here, and the ones Marsi has written before are amazing and admireable. I pray for you and Marsi and your entire family, and wish you strength and peace.
ReplyDeleteJennifer and Chris Sothras
Marsi and Steve,
ReplyDeleteChris and I think and pray for you often. Since the day I met you 6.5 years ago, you have been an inspiration. You are truly a kindred spirit and will be with us always. Your strength, positive attitude and fight have provided strength to us all. You are such an amazing mother and wife. I can only hope to be half of what you are; you have two adorable children who will go on to accomplish greatness in life because of the legacy and guidance you have provided for them. This is a silly story, but I wanted to share it with you. I remember when I first brought Ethan to the office in his tiny little infant shoes on the wrong feet and you were the one person that told me the easiest way to tell if shoes are on the right feet with an infant is to have the velcro facing outward. Everyday since that I put on Ethan's shoes and tighten the velcro, I smile and think of you.
You and your family will forever be in my thougths and prayers and I am sending you much strength and peace.
Mindy and Chris Collins
Our thoughts and paryers are with you and your family.
ReplyDelete-The Blackwood Family
Steve your beautiful words have touched our hearts! Thank u for the update. Maris is a beautiful person inside and out. We keep her and your family in hearts with much prayer for peace and comfort. Marisi, you are a warrior and have taught me what real courage is. Thank you for being in our lives. We think of your beautiful smile and admire your quiet strength. We will be here for you and your family. With much love, the paysons
ReplyDeleteThanks for the update Steve. I really enjoyed getting to know you and Marsi during my year working with Marsi at Children's. You two have such a wonderful, caring relationship. I loved hearing about how you first met and what a great father and teacher you are when Marsi and I went out to eat at Baja Fresh each week. It's hard to believe that your little toddler is the grown-up boy I see on Facebook today.
ReplyDeleteMarsi - you are an amazing writer and person. Thank you for sharing the story of your fight against cancer with all of us. We're rooting for you in North Carolina! - Julia Kulla-Mader
Steve and Marsi, I am a random subscriber, who has a good friend fighting the same battle. I am grateful for how Marsi shared her heart and bared her soul in her blog, because it gave me a better understanding and perspective. My thoughts, prayers, and love are with you and your family. -Anne
ReplyDeleteIt has been 7 years since I left Rady's and since we have seen each other Marsi, but I am so honored to have known you and kept in touch via posts. I have read almost all of your blogs and have been inspired by your courage and strength. I think of you often and pray for you, Steve and the kids always. Thank you for sharing yourself and I wish you nothing but peace.
ReplyDeleteHeather Ott
Marsi - although we didn't know each other well - I remember clearly the first time we sat and spoke to each other. I also remember the many times I have seen you - trick or treating - the talent show - and just how beautiful you looked, the smiles on your face as you experienced life through the eyes of the kids. I've so enjoyed reading your blog (I especially liked the walk with Cooper video), and have been truly amazed at how eloquently you have led us all through the journey with you. My thoughts and prayers have been with you - I'm sorry I never really took the chance to say so before now. It's just that it's a hard thing to say, because there is absolutely nothing that sounds "right". Christy M
ReplyDeleteSteve, it was so great to see you the other day and listen to you talk about your beautiful wife! The love you have for her is amazing. Hold Marsi's hand, hold her close, and just be present for every moment. Everybody else will understand.... what you and Marsi share is a true love story!
ReplyDeleteLove, Brandy and Joe
Steve and Marsi,
ReplyDeleteIt was so great to spend time with you guys last week. Those are moments I will always treasure. We love you guys!
Ron and Amy
No complaints and no regrets
ReplyDeleteI still believe in chasing dreams and placing bets
And I have learned that all you give is all you get
So give it all you've got
So here's to life
And every joy it brings
Here's to life
To dreamers and their dreams
Funny how the time just flies
Dear Marsi and Steve,
ReplyDeleteYour strength, courage and, above all, your devoted love for each other throughout this difficult journey has been a true inspiration to so many people. I think of you often and wish you much strength, peace and wonderful moments surrounded by your family and loved ones.
Jenny
Your words are beautiful, and your love for your wife is inspiring. Wishing you and your familiy peace and love.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful uncle Steve. I love you guys so much. -
ReplyDeleteTyler
Your beautiful words are inspiring Steve. The love between you and Marsi is amazing. You are both stronger than any other couple I have known. My prayers are with you and your family xoxoxo Patty
ReplyDeleteSteve and Marsi - you are in our thoughts and prayers. Steve thank you for sharing and letting us into see Marsi through your eyes. I knew the very first time I met you Marsi that you were a very special lady, I only wish I had known you more! You children are beautiful and kind and you will live on in them for the rest of their lives. Many prayers for your peace and comfort. We are here for you guys!! Love - Shylo
ReplyDeleteSteve and Marsi,
ReplyDeleteI have been keeping up through Liz and this blog on your journey. Treasure every moment, continue to write them down. Sending love and prayers.
Sarah ONeal & family
Beautifully written Steve. The love you two have for each other is something I deeply admire. You both have demonstrated a strength that many of us wish we had. I am honored to call you friends. Marsi, you are one if the most beautiful women I have ever met, inside and out. You and your family is in my heart, my thoughts and my prayers! I love you guys, Dawn
ReplyDeleteSteve and Marsi,
ReplyDeleteYou are in my thoughts and prayers daily. Marsi I haven known you seems like forever. I watched you grow into a beautiful women, daughter,wife,mother. I remember our trip to Lake Powell with all our fun adventures. Then meeting Steve and thinking how in love you two are. How you both were meant for one another. Then seeing the product of your love, within your two children.
I send you air hugs and Love,
Luella Salter and family <3
Steve and Marsi,
ReplyDeleteYou and your family are so special and you are so lucky to have such a loving relationship. You all are in our thoughts and prayers.
Love you, Tom and Margaret Dennison
Hello Steve and Marsi,
ReplyDeleteIt's Blanca over here. I just got this link today as I asked about Marsi. Girly you are so inspiring and such an amazing woman. As I read this blog and the one following as Steve spoke of your dance together, I remember the two of you sitting at the same table with me one Christmas co. party. You and Steve seemed so happy and full of joy to be out on a date night. I'll never forget thinking to myself how I wanted that with my husband: The fun times, the nights out, the dancing - He had to work that night so my bestfriend had to go in his place. I truly admire your strength and love for eachother, not to mention your children.
My prayers are with you, Marsi.