This morning, I looked down at our carpet and decided to vacuum. For those of you who do not know Cooper, he is our two-year-old, 80-lb golden retriever, a lovebug who enjoys evenings and rainy days in the house. As the weather dictated this weekend, he has been in the house a lot! Cooper leaves behind a mountain of dog hair. Out of the four of us who live here, I think I am the only one that it really bothers - but now that I have a Dyson Pet Vacuum, I have a solution.
As I was vacuuming, it occurred to me that the hair on the floor may not just be Cooper's. My hair started to shed last Thursday, in line with the warnings I had received that I would start losing hair at the 10 day mark.
My original wig fitting appointment was this past Saturday. Even though I had started to lose hair on Thursday, I canceled it. I wanted, or really needed, one last weekend with my own hair. My friend Jeanie Spies, RN, PNP came to see me on Thursday. Jeanie has been a trusted advisor of mine since my diagnosis as she manages the Integrative Medicine Program in the Peckham Center for Blood Disorders at Rady Children's. Anyway, when I told Jeanie about my hair, she reminded me that there is a mourning process to losing your hair. Thanks, Jeanie - I am glad I took the extra weekend to enjoy it.
In the interim, I had a very, very special visitors this weekend from the Bay Area, Jennie, Shelley, and Carrie (and April and Lynn in spirit). My Sonoma State roommates, we went through it all together. They know my secrets and have seen me at my best and my worst. They were at my beck and call all weekend - we even spent all day Saturday purging Madison's bedroom. Whew! On Saturday night, thanks to Steve's family, I took the girls to see the Ten Tenors, where we met the Ten Tenors after the show and had fun poking at them a little. (Carrie was telling each of them that they were her favorite--granted they were sitting right next to one another!)
To keep this momentum going, I suggested a stop to a local dive bar, Pal Joey's, where I knew there would be a live band. I also knew that this probably was not the best place for me, but I needed the release. And I needed the release to be with my girls. We danced. I danced with a gentleman that reminded us all a bit of Mr. Rogers. Steve showed up for a dance and to take me home. We toasted to my next dance being in a wig. A perfect end to a perfect night.
So now, at day 14 my hair is falling out in droves. Dr. Hansen called to check on me this weekend and reminded me that hair loss is an indicator that chemo is working. I needed that reminder.
So what do I think about my hair? Well, at this moment, I am sitting on my couch typing in this blog hoping to find some peace with it. I also need to make some practical decisions too - like do I want to cut it now or do I want to leave trails of hair everywhere I go until Friday. Hmm....At least I know that Cooper won't mind.
P.S. The girls cleaning Maddie's room this weekend was huge, but should not overshadow Liz and Tom coming over on Thursday and putting up our tree, decorating the house and cleaning out our fridge/pantry/cupboards in the kitchen. Absolutely awesome. Thanks so much!!!! XXOO.
Loved every minute of it and glad to help out. I'll be thinking of you everyday. XOXOs to the family and a special hug to Steve. What a trooper he has been and so happy you have such a wonderful support group. Love, Shelley
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